I've Moved!

For Christmas this year, my wonderful husband created a new blog site for me. Come check it out! www.karleneclark.com

Happy New Year!

My Summary of Biblical Equality (Part One)

Plenty of lengthy explanations for a biblical understanding of gender equality exist, on the web and in print. I would still like to offer what I hope will be a brief summary of my own framework for a scriptural understanding of equality. Let’s start with some myth-busting.

Myth: Egalitarians believe “equality” means “same.”
Of course men and women are different - in significant, and not-so-significant ways. Women carry babies. Men have more upper body strength. (I’m already thinking of exceptions.) There are differences in brain development, in hormone excretion, and in socialization. Christian egalitarians are not interested in obliterating the genuine differences between women and men. We are concerned with, to quote Rebecca Grouthuis, “what difference the differences make.” Broad generalizations about what men are like or what women are like usually aren’t helpful. They don’t fit very well. They don’t account for personality type differences or cultural differences. They reinforce stereotypes. They marginalize the exceptions. And they erode the foundation for unity, reconciliation, and intimacy that women and men need with one another. An extreme emphasis on difference (like my classmate’s declaration that we are “100% different”) erodes mutual understanding. Historically it has been a foundation for misogyny. Considering the biblical emphasis on unity, the practice of emphasizing our common humanity as a basis for relationship seems like a pretty sound starting point.

Myth: Equality means the woman is in charge instead of the man. I’ve spoken with many people who believe that one person in a marriage must be in charge, and if it’s not the man then the woman takes over. Equality is about a partnership of equals who share power and mutually submit to one another. It’s not a cover for male subordination by women. (Ironically, if you look more closely at some of these male headship marriages, the person who is really in charge isn’t the man. Power will try to balance itself out, in subversive or manipulative ways if more direct ways are not available.) Incidentally, egalitarians don’t think it’s any better for the wife to be in charge of the husband. We really believe in equality.

Myth: The husband must be the final decision-maker and this is biblical. This is bunk. It’s not biblical and even really literal approaches to interpretation can’t reasonably substantiate this claim from scripture. And in practice, two loving adults who are equally vested in the outcome of a decision can share that decision and reach consensus. One person having the power to trump all decisions is not healthy. Once I had a conversation with a man who felt really strongly about being the “final decision maker.” I asked him why, if there must be one, it should be him. Is he smarter than his wife? Is he better at solving problems than his wife? Is he more important than his wife? No. no. no. “It’s because I’m the MAN.” But what about being the man makes you more qualified to make decisions? Is there a special decision-making device in your, um, male accessories? No. I asked him to tell me about some decisions he had made to trump his wife when they couldn’t agree. He hemmed and hawed, but couldn’t come up with any. In desperation he said, “Doesn’t the bible say the man is supposed to be the decision maker?” He doesn’t have any respect for the bible, but knows I’m a Christian, so he tries to use scripture to justify his fragile male authority. “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ” is a great starting place for making tough decisions together in a marriage. And that IS biblical.

Okay – that’s more than enough for now. Stay tuned for more on equality and the scriptures.

Christian Gender Stuff

It just keeps coming up, like a disease that won't be cured. The subordination of women in the Church and in the family. I was surfing the website of a cool church that I've admired from afar for awhile. Neat church, involved with wonderful ministries, has great ideas about how to do church. And then I took a look at their leadership. All male elders, all male pastors. A female administrator and a female children's worker (not pastor).

A similarly cool church just recently posted their official position on women, in which they try to give women lots of opportunities, but are careful to make sure a woman is always under a man's authority. I appreciate that they are gracious to those who don't agree with their position, but I find their reasoning to be very flawed and their use of scripture inconsistent.

Josh and I have a traditionalist friend at school. Being a Foursquare pastor, he affirms women in pastoral ministry, but is adamant about hierarchy in marriage. He made the statement in class today that men and women are "100% different." (!!!!) He thinks that us egalitarians believe men and women are 100% same. But we don't, and the seemingly deliberate choice to misunderstand our position gets frustrating after awhile.

Some friends were just sharing the other day how they left a big church in town because of the consistent message of women's subordination. They didn't want their children growing up in a church where they would experience the demeaning of women in the name of being biblical.

Josh and I are starting up a church plant and we haven't spent much energy on this gender business. We've got ministry on our minds and this just isn't our issue. We are co-pastors and it just seems natural for us to work as a team. The full equality of women and men is a basic assumption that we share. But sometimes we almost forget that this isn't the way it works in lots of other churches. And I forget too, that lots of people have never heard a biblical case for gender equality. Maybe it's time to revisit this issue.

(credits: I stole this fun cartoon from deconversion dot com)

Giving Thanks

The sky is a clear, winter blue and the morning sunshine is streaming onto the frosty landscape, beginning to thaw the frozen ground. We were up before the sun this morning - not really my favorite thing to do. But since we're hosting my husband's family for the Thanksgiving meal today, we willingly rose up from bed (after hitting snooze 2 or 3 times) and got to work on the turkey and cinnamon roles.

I've always said that whenever it fell on me to make a Thanksgiving turkey, we'd be having ham. I'm pretty squeamish about that whole corpse-in-a-bag thing. But thankfully :) Josh isn't. He made a special spice rub and applied it under the skin (:::shudder:::) and now we can already smell the savory seasonal scent of roasting turkey. My morning job, other than moral support for the turkey guy, was to roll out the cinnamon roles and get them rising and in the oven. I love making cinnamon roles almost as much as eating them. Kneading the dough is therapeutic, and there is something beautiful to me in the way yeast rises and in the swirl pattern of the roles when they are sliced and placed in the pan.

After a hot cup of french-pressed coffee and some snuggle time while doing a sudoku on the couch, it's time to do some last-minute cleaning, get our showers, and say a prayer together for the day.

I have so much to give thanks for today! My wonderful daughter, with her messy morning hair pulled into a haphazard pony tail who is eating a cinnamon role and reading the comics across the table from me. Our crazy dog who keeps poking his head into my lap for me to pet him, as he smiles with his dimples. And my wonderful husband, who has the ability to make me laugh even at 6:30 in the morning, and who has enriched my life more than I can say. This is our first Thanksgiving as a married couple, and it was two years ago this week that we went on our first date and knew we'd be together forever. Holidays used to have a bittersweetness about them, as they seemed to heighten the loneliness of being a divorced single mom. The burden of making things special was heavier, and my awareness of being the only adult in the room without a spouse to sit beside me at the table was always just there. I'm thankful for the blessing of such a wonderful husband this year - who shares with me the joys and challenges of life, who inspires me with his strength and courage, and who can rub down a raw turkey without gagging even once.

I'm in a bit of a sentimental mood today, and I could wax on about family, friends, hopes, dreams, and gifts for which I am especially grateful. But preparations are calling. To all of you, may your hearts be filled with gratitude for every blessing large and small that is yours today. And may we all remember and pray for those who are unable to share our joy and gratitude.

I'll close with the prayer Maria clipped this morning from Dear Abby to pray with the family today:

Oh, Heavenly Father,
We thank thee for food and remember the hungry.
We thank thee for health and remember the sick.
We thank thee for friends and remember the friendless.
We thank thee for freedom and remember the enslaved.
May these remembrances stir us to service,
That thy gifts to us may be used for others.
Amen.

and Happy Thanksgiving!

Consumer Addiction

This weekend my husband Josh was going through the paper and came across a Walmart Christmas catalog insert. It came with a ready-made wish list for kids and instructions on how to help your kids pick out all the stuff they want for Christmas. Josh had me laughing when he clutched the catalog, closed his eyes tightly and said, “I wish that Walmart would stop purchasing goods made from sweat shops, would provide just and fair treatment for their employees and adopt sustainable environmental practices.”

Last August, while walking around in the heat of the summer in shorts, we were astounded to see our first window display for Christmas. I know it always seems like it starts earlier every year, but August just seems ridiculous.

Josh gave a really poignant devotional in class this morning. While researching the effects of alcoholism on families, he was pondering the addict's experience of building up tolerance. Over time, an addict builds up tolerance to their substance and requires ever increasing amounts in order to experience the same effect. He compared this to the materialism and consumerism of our culture. As a culture we are showing the signs of addictive tolerance to consumption – we need more and more stuff to feel the same effect.

I remember being amazed reading the Little House books, how excited the kids would get at Christmas time over getting a single orange, a penny, or a cookie baked with white flour. This, compared with the Walmart catalog that says, “If you only get me 20 gifts this Christmas make sure this is one of them.” We are taught to be upwardly mobile, to seek after more money, better paying jobs, bigger houses, fancier cars, and more toys. It is completely counter-cultural to drive an old car if you have the money for a new one, or live in a small house if you can afford a bigger one, and so on. It seems that we are diseased with an addiction to consume. I would like to share the scripture Josh shared this morning that speaks volumes to us.

“The ground of a certain rich man yielded an abundant harvest. He thought to himself, ‘What shall I do? I have no place to store my crops.’ Then he said, ‘This is what I’ll do. I will tear down my barns and build bigger ones, and there I will store my surplus grain. And I’ll say to myself, “You have plenty of grain laid up for many years. Take life easy; eat, drink and be merry.”’ But God said to him, ‘You fool! This very night your life will be demanded form you. Then who will get what you have prepared for yourself?’ This is how it will be with those who store up things for themselves but are not rich toward God.” Luke 12:16-21 TNIV

May we learn what it means to become rich toward God!

Off The Map LIVE - Women's Panel

Last year's panel of women leaders turned out to be rather a disaster. A panel of educated, intelligent, wise, and interesting women were given the privilege of asking a couple men some questions. ick. Brian McLaren was one of those men and he was insightful enough to recognize the problem and name it in the moment, but it was a miss and very disappointing. I think it would have been great to reunite that panel and have the questions asked in the appropriate direction. In the absence of that, I was thrilled to experience this morning's panel of women.

Lisa Domke facilitated the conversation with Sadell Bradley, Diana Butler Bass, and Ann (I missed her last name-sorry!) on the topic of dialogue with people different from ourselves. The interaction fascinated me and I greatly appreciated the opportunity to hear them.

I just want to pick out one little thought from the session. A woman asked a question about the tension between following one's heart on the journey of faith and betraying family and friends. Sadell pointed out that this kind of "betrayal" has always gone along with following Jesus, that Jesus himself said if anyone loves father, mother, lands, property, etc. more than him, that one is not worthy of following Jesus. Diana said that the biggest betrayal is the one to yourself. She said (and I hope I'm not misrepresenting her) that by being true to yourself and who you are in that tension ultimately you become a better daughter, friend, etc... and a better Christian as well. It reminded me of a prayer of Kierkergaard, "And now with God's help, I shall become myself."

That kind of betrayal of self - of the self created by God - is one that women have often done in order to avoid great persecution. I can think of times when I've been guilty of that kind of betrayal, but also - thankfully! - I can think of times when I've been tempted to but have learned to resist. And I think Diana is right - when I've remained true to the woman God has created me to be, it has resulted in my being a better follower of Christ, friend, daughter, etc. I can't help but think that if I had been exposed to women like these when I was growing up, that I might have learned to resist self-betrayal much earlier in life.

Off The Map LIVE - Quote of the Morning"

"...like a bunch of middle aged guys trying to create a new line of feminine hygiene products."
Richard Twiss

on certain voices in the postmodern conversation.

Off The Map LIVE - Thoughts on Diana Butler-Bass

In her talk this morning, Diana Butler-Bass used her tinker toy model to describe the continuums of liberal-conservative, conventional-purposeful change, and modern-postmodern. Among other things she explained how people traditionally polarized on the liberal-conservative axis are finding a lot of common ground when they talk about how to respond to a changing world and how to be more purposeful, etc. with their faith and worship. We share questions about how to reach a changing world.

I’m really encouraged by this new shared space for relationship and friendship between mainline and evangelical protestants. An evangelical friend shared with me a conversation she had with a mainline friend on this subject matter. The mainline friend said, “You’ve got the fire, we’ve got the fireplace.” That might not be entirely fair, but it made me smile. I think many of us on all points of the liberal-conservative spectrum are tired of fighting all the old fights and ready to find some common ground.

Here’s the rub though. Many of the conservative folks I know are still very suspicious of all things that can be labeled liberal. And when some of us walk into this shared space and engage in relationships as Diana described this morning, we become suspect as well. I hope we will see more and more engagement and that we will learn from each other along the way.

Off The Map LIVE - Quote of the Morning

“The practice of Christianity, done well, is both dangerous and magnetic.”
Diana Butler-Bass

(who says she was once called the 'devil's whore' by James Dobson. he he he)

Off The Map LIVE - Quote of the Night

"When the chips are down, the buffalo is empty."

Richard Twiss

CCDA 2007 Show Me Jesus Beyond the Walls

We are newcomers to the CCDA (Christian Community Development Association). I didn’t even know who they were until doing my research in a class on Reconciliation last winter. Since that time, they have been very influential in helping shape the direction of our church planting plans and we continue to be challenged with their vision of community transformation through the local church by the three “r’s” – relocation, redistribution and reconciliation. Attending their 19th annual conference in St. Louis was a great privilege and joy for Josh and me. This conference inspired, moved, and challenged us at every turn. Our mornings began with a “bible study” given by Dr. John Perkins. If that hour of the day was all that we came to St. Louis for, it would have been worth it. I put “bible study” in quotes only because Dr. Perkins is a preacher and his preaching doesn’t resemble anything I’ve experienced under the title of “bible study” before. His passion for CCD, for the plight of impoverished urban black communities, for racial reconciliation and for the very gospel inspired me and challenged me to the core.

The evening plenary sessions were all excellent. They featured speakers of different races, genders and ages who each brought their unique perspectives and experiences. I won’t attempt to summarize all that we heard, but just say that this conference was what we hoped it to be – empowering and inspiring in a profound way. We felt the energy of about 2000 people who share a common mission and who are doing what we are still dreaming of doing. Their hard work and triumph over so many obstacles makes CCD seem possible. Their sheer numbers make us feel a little less lonely and a little less weird for the vision we have.

The conference offered an abundance of options for afternoon workshop sessions on such a variety of topics from the ideological to the practical. For the most part we enjoyed these and gained from them. I had the privilege of hearing Shane Claiborne talk about some of the content of his latest book that is about to be released, “Jesus for President.” I appreciate his thoughtfulness in engaging the issue of politics, empire, and following Jesus. I’m looking forward to reading the new book.

A few thoughts and observations: I am more aware than ever of how little I’ve been challenged on issues of race by virtue of growing up white in mostly white Eugene. Being able to hear the stories of black and latino brothers and sisters has opened my eyes a bit to realities of racism that I have mostly been able to avoid. In Eugene/ Springfield we have a growing Latino community that feels very separate from the white community and nearly invisible at times. But even I have felt the increased tension between the two communities since immigration has become such a hot issue. I’m feeling challenged to reach out and learn from this community.

It’s still very new and refreshing for me to be around evangelical Christians who are all about social justice. When the same preacher talks about the joy of seeing people saved and baptized, and then promotes traditionally “liberal” things like national health care and disapproval of war, it still surprises me. And I love it. I love this wholistic understanding of the gospel that is concerned with bodies and souls, with individuals and communities, with reconciliation with God and with one another.

We will be prayerfully contemplating much of what we heard at this conference for the foreseeable future. The basic tenants of this kind of church are too challenging to be followed outside of a strong and genuine sense of calling. The implications of relocation seem the most daunting, but in the long run I suspect that redistribution and reconciliation are the harder tasks. For such endeavors to be joyful, they must come from true calling and passion. For this we pray that we will clearly hear what God is calling us to do, and that we will have the faith and courage to follow.

Planes, Trains, and Automobiles: Part Two

I started writing the next installment of our trip and ended up losing it by not saving. So I’m a little behind sharing about our Midwest adventures.

The rest of our time in Chicago was quite fun. We spent Tuesday morning at the Art Institute. Josh has been there many times, but it was my first and I could have spent a week there. We used most of our time viewing Impressionist and post-Impressionist paintings, and their collection is truly amazing. I always enjoy the benefit of having an art major as my personal tour guide.

We met up with Ben, another college friend of Josh’s along with a friend of his, and took off walking North through downtown. We ate at the famous Billy Goat Tavern (“Hamborger, hamborger, hamborger! No fries, chips! No Pepsi, Coke!”) which is home to the legend of the Cubs’ curse and which is frequented by journalists from the nearby Chicago Tribune. It also boasts being the lowest restaurant in town, located downstairs under the streets and buildings above. We went from lunch at the lowest restaurant to an afternoon snack and drink at the highest restaurant – the Signature Lounge atop the Hancock building. All of the views are breathtaking, but apparently the best view is from the women’s restroom. Go figure.

We stopped for a few minutes at the Apple store for the guys to fondle iPhones and check out the live band playing on the second floor. We took pictures of the famous water tower – the only building left standing after the historic Chicago Fire. For dinner we met up with Terry, yet another college friend of Josh’s and all of us squeezed into his car and trekked to Duffy’s for $1 burgers. After dinner Terry took Josh and I to a great coffee shop, and then for a brief but pleasant visit at his home. By this time it was getting late, and Terry dropped us off at the nearest el station.

At this point we were somewhere on the brown line north of downtown and it wasn’t early. We took the brown line back downtown, transferred to the green line and took that back to our temporary digs in Oak Park. We picked up our car there and drove all the way out to O’Hare to return it, and then we got on the blue line and took it all the way back downtown, transferred again to the green line and took it back to Oak Park again. All told, it took about 2 ½ hours before we were back to our Murphy bed at the Write Inn, rather exhausted and sick of the el.

Wednesday morning we were up early, rode the green line back downtown, transferred to the pink line, and got off near Union Station, just over the river from the Sears Tower. This was our first experience with rush hour in Chicago, and I think we must have looked pretty odd with our big packs walking upstream through the throngs of professionals streaming up the sidewalk toward their office destinations. We managed to find coffee and a small breakfast (bagel for me, yogurt oatmeal for Josh) and to retrieve our Amtrak tickets at a kiosk inside Union Station.

This was my first experience with Amtrak, and I must say that it was well worth the $23 ticket for travel from Chicago to St. Louis. We had a most amusing conductor – the kind of guy who understands that train to be his little kingdom and himself its benevolent dictator. His uniform enhanced his persona of jovial importance, as he prodded people to put the required ID tags on their luggage and made corny jokes with the passengers. We weren’t sure whether to find him irritating or just highly amusing, but in any case he kept the trip from ever seeming boring. We grew hungry partway through the 4 ½ hour trip and ventured to eat from the snack car. The greasy gut bomb held us over until we found some yummy teriyaki bowls in St Louis.

After the overwhelming hugeness of Chicago, St. Louis seemed rather small – which is saying something considering where we hail from. We found our way easily to the metro station and after a short wait got our ride downtown to the Arch stop. Our reason for being in St. Louis was to attend the Christian Community Development Association conference being held at the Adam’s Mark Hotel – conveniently located directly across the street from the Arch and the old courthouse where the Dred Scott case was tried. We were enthusiastically greeted at the front door by a CCDA volunteer, and as we got checked into the hotel and then the conference I felt myself swelling with excitement at the opportunity to participate in this conference.

Planes, Trains, and Automobiles: Part One

Last Thursday Josh and I set out from Eugene for a 10-day trip to Cedar Rapids, Chicago, Valparaiso, and St. Louis. The first occasion for the trip was a wedding of an old friend of Josh’s in Cedar Rapids, Iowa. Since he had accepted the invitation to be in the wedding, we found out that the CCDA was having their annual conference in St. Louis the following week, and one thing led to another. Being so close to Josh’s alma mater, Valparaiso University, made a visit there possible as well.

We landed in Chicago very late Thursday, got up Friday and drove the 4 ½ hour trek to Cedar Rapids in time for the rehearsal/ dinner. Saturday we took in the wedding and then turned back around to Chicago. We found a really charming and not too spendy hotel in Oak Park, across from the Hemingway Museum. The Midwest appears to have two coffee shops – Starbucks and Caribou Coffee. Caribou is much cooler, and has free WiFi, and one is located just a block from our hotel. Sunday morning we walked over for a cup of coffee and enjoyed the delightful ending of Pride and Prejudice, which we have been reading together for several weeks.

After coffee we checked out and made a pilgrimage of sorts to Lawndale Community Church. Lawndale is a CCDA church pastored by one of its founding members, Wayne “Coach” Gordon. We really loved our experience worshipping there, and left feeling inspired and a bit in awe. Both sides of the street are lined with ministries of this church, including a youth center, dental & eye clinic, a community center, a residential recovery home, and a rather large health care clinic. The service included some wonderful gospel music, and we felt buoyed up by the spirit of joy and praise among them. The sermon was good, the people welcoming, and the ministry of the church inspiring. We left feeling grateful that we had the privilege of worshiping there and seeing first hand what this famous community is like on Sunday morning.

In the afternoon we took the el into downtown Chicago – the first train of our planes, trains, and automobile experience. Josh has spent quite a bit of time in Chicago since going to college just an hour or so away. But this is my first time in the city. It happened to be the day of the Chicago Marathon, and downtown was teeming with runners and their fans. We walked to Millennium Park and took in the very cool art installations – the spitting face fountains, the “bean,” and the exploding steel amphitheatre. We decided to do Sears Tower, and walked through the towering giant buildings until facing the tallest of them all. wow! Heights tend to freak me out a bit, but the 103rd floor is enclosed and not terribly frightening. We had beautiful views in every direction, with the afternoon sun beaming on the West Side. When we’d taken in all the views, and way too many pictures, we descended and set out walking again. After smoothies at Jamaba Juice (one of them free thanks to a generous employee at closing time) we trekked up to the beautiful Buckingham fountain as its lights were coming on for the evening.

As the city lights began to come on we saw that many of the buildings, including Sears Tower are displaying pink lights to promote breast cancer awareness. One of my dearest friends has just begun chemo in her fight against breast cancer, and as I saw all the pink lights coming on it felt like all of Chicago was shining its support for MeKeesha.

Concerned about the Sunday night train schedule, we decided to catch the el back to our car in Oak Park, and make our drive to Valparaiso, Indiana.

Valparaiso is the home of the university where Josh did his undergrad work, so this part of our trip was a stroll down memory lane for him. He was in awe of all the changes – both to the city and the university. We grabbed a tasty dinner near campus and then took in the candlelight Vespers service in their stunning chapel building. After, we retired for the night at the Valpo Super 8.

This brings us to this morning, Monday, of our travel log. We slept in, and got ourselves checked out just in time to meet an old friend of Josh’s for lunch. After lots of laughs and stories, she had to get back to work, and we spent the rest of the afternoon perusing the campus, visiting a few people Josh knew, and taking in a class with his favorite art professor. After seeing the new buildings, and a few old ones, grabbing a smooch on the Kissing Bridge, and walking (rather too quickly) through the new labrynth, we left Valpo and headed back into Chicago.

We’re back in our cute hotel in Oak Park for two nights – the first two we’ve spent in the same place – and then we’ll be taking a train to St. Louis on Wednesday.

Identification

I want to draw attention to my friend Rachel’s excellent post entitled My Carefully Calibrated Difference on her personal blog. http://rachelstanton.wordpress.com/ I really identify with her thoughts about identification with the ‘other’ and the internal struggle coinciding with it.

As we talk more with others about this church community we are preparing to form we get some interesting responses. At the suggestion that we desire to be a church of and among the poor, a few people have expressed their fear that we are making ourselves vulnerable to be victims of crime – even exposing our daughter to be raped! One well-meaning gentleman pulled me aside on two occasions to warn me about the way “those people” think and behave. One person suggested that if we have any home meetings, we should have them in the garage so that none of “those people” see our belongings and come back later to steal them.

It’s fine and noble that we want to help “those people,” but we should be careful not to expose ourselves or be too vulnerable. And we need to keep the invisible boundaries of superiority in place at all times. At least – this is the message so many communicate to us.

As we struggle to work out the implications of identification, which we readily concede to be a process barely begun within us and which we know to be impossible but for the grace of God, the warnings of our middle class friends only help us to see our own hypocrisy and strengthen our resolve to press on. The Church needs to be reconciled within itself among the rich, the poor, and the middle classes who look at one another across economic divides with suspicion and pride. We humbly pray for the grace to be an agent of that reconciliation.

Clash of (parenting) Values

I met a home-school mom the other day. She explained to me that her kids asked to go to public school one year, and she let them so they could “learn their lesson.” Sure enough, they were begging to be back home with mom by the end of the year. She said her primary objection to public school is not the quality of the education (which surprised me), but rather the quality of the other children. She went on about how terrible the kids were, visibly shuddering as she described their need for decent parenting. She doesn’t want her kids subjected to them.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not against home-schooling and I think it’s a great option for lots of families for a variety of reasons. I just don’t share this woman’s reasoning. at all.

The elementary school this mom referred to is located in an area with a large population of low-income families. It is the same school my daughter attended – and loved – for six years. Maria always had lots of friends from homes with various disadvantages. Sometimes these kids have been mean and inappropriate, and Maria has had to cope with that. So I don’t doubt the basic observations of this home-schooling mom.

Her philosophy is that all those heathen kids might corrupt or harm her kids, and that her nice Christian children should be protected from them.

My philosophy has always been that my daughter will have to live in this world – for better or worse – all her life. The sooner she learns how to navigate relationships with diverse people of different beliefs, family cultures, and values, the better. I believe it’s better for her to experience occasional pain in social situations, and then learn how to navigate it, than it would be for her to avoid social pain by isolation. It’s better for her to see how others live and be able to contrast our values and beliefs with others as she is developing rather than be exposed to the world all at once when she hits college. But the most important difference between our practices is that I believe all those other “bad” kids aren’t bad. They are just kids who need to be loved, and who have something to offer us as well as we to them.

This means my daughter has friends who come from homes where abuse, addiction, neglect and even violence are daily realities. We can’t change their realities, but we can open our hearts to them, offer them true hospitality, and love them with the love of Christ. They have enriched our lives probably more than we’ve enriched theirs.

How could we follow in the footsteps of Jesus while bunkering down in our houses trying to avoid contamination?

Seasons Change

My husband and I took a walk with Charlie last evening down by the river. It was one of those days when it’s still sunny and a bit hot, but if you’re paying attention you can tell that Fall is coming. Summer blackberries are ripe for picking and it still feels great in shorts. But there are already early Fall leaves crunching under our feet where the path moves under the trees. The season is changing.

When summer turns into Fall each year I feel this mixture of emotions. Summer is never quite long enough. We didn’t go on all the hikes we wanted to, or make it to the beach nearly enough. We didn’t get out and walk these lovely paths near our house as often as we wished. And there are projects around the house that we didn’t quite finish. As a person who is perpetually chilly, I love the heat. So there is always a bit of grief knowing that Summer is about to move to the back of the line in the cycle of changing seasons.

But I also feel a pleasant anticipation for Fall. The part of me that is ready to return to a schedule, that enjoys school and studying, that loves the coziness of a warm sweater and a hot cup of coffee on a chilly day, and the stunning beauty of nature’s soon-coming color show.

The change in seasons is also marking another transition for our family this year. Sunday marks our farewell celebration from the church where we have been. Josh is leaving his full-time job next week in order to do freelance graphic design from home part-time. The time has finally come for us to turn our attention and energy to the creation of a new faith community – something we’ve dreamed of together since the first few weeks of our relationship.

There is some appropriate grief for the season we are leaving behind - our time at a church with people we love and appreciate, the safety of being in "preparation," the security of one of our regular paychecks, the rhythm of life we're used to. But there is also great anticipation for a new season with its challenges, risks, joys, trials, and opportunities for making a difference in our community.

Blind Spots in the Emerging Church?

In a seminary class on reconciliation, another student gave an excellent presentation pertaining to the Millennials - the generation coming up quickly behind Gen X. In the midst of his very compelling report he commented as an aside that the emerging church isn't cutting it with this generation. He said the emerging church is mainly for Gen Xers and Boomers, and they don't seem to be having many conversations about the younger people just behind them who are distinct from them in many significant ways, and who are largely being missed by the church.

I've been pondering that observation and wondering just how true it is. I can certainly think of a few exceptions. But I think he might have a very good point. It appears that the EC is having some conversations about what to do with their children, now that they are growing and having families and finding existing, traditional models of discipleship with children to be inadequate. But what about the gap between the parents and the young children? Where are the Millennials in the emerging church? I'd love to hear from people on this subject.

As we prepare for planting what we hope will be a multi-class church, I've been keeping my eyes open for emerging churches who are involved in doing ministry with the poor as multi-class congregations. There is no doubt that the EC generally has a strong social conscience - caring about creation, AIDS, and global poverty. But how many have reached beyond the limits of charity to be churches of and with the poor? Again, I can think of a couple of exceptions. But for the most part, the EC generally appears to be a movement of middle class folks who do more charity than justice - at least on the local level.

I know there are some fabulous exceptions in the EC world to both of these observations. But what do you think? Do we have some blind spots in these areas?

Learning from Charlie

Last weekend my family adopted a dog from the county pound. Charlie is a beautiful lab mutt, with perhaps a dash of Retriever or Aussie. He is settling in nicely with our family and is proving to be a wonderful dog. But Charlie has one very strong trait – fear. The pound was such a traumatic place for him that he refused to leave his kennel voluntarily. While he warmed up to us right away, he continued to tremble with fear at each new thing. He had to be coaxed into the car, into the house, out of the house, and into any other room besides the living room. He cowers when we pass other people or dogs on the sidewalk. We don’t know his history, but there’s a very good chance that our sweet Charlie has experienced some abuse. And even though he’s safe and loved and in a caring home now, it is going to take a long time to get over those fears and learned behaviors. He might never fully get over them.

I have to admit that I really identify with Charlie. The most painful experiences of my past have left me with deep, irrational fears that lurk in places too deep to root out easily. I keep a pretty good poker face most of the time, but inside I cower and cringe and tremble on a regular basis. There are times when I want to hide my head in the pillow the way Charlie hides his face in my lap. I know that I’m safe, that I’m loved, and that I’m home. But some fears stubbornly remain.

I don’t think I’m unique in this experience. We are all formed by our past – especially by the events of our childhoods. If our trust was violated at a young age by neglect, abuse, abandonment, betrayal, or death, it can shape the very way we understand the world and all that we come to expect of it. If later events reinforce those fears (and sometimes our fearful behavior can help create repetition of those experiences), healing and freedom are even harder to come by. Often we take our fears into our relationship with God – the place where we are in fact completely safe and completely loved. Like Charlie with his new family, we cringe and cower and duck away from the loving and gentle hand of God that reaches out to care for us.

So how do we heal? Just as Charlie is noticeably more at ease after just a few days with us, I think that healing begins when we open ourselves to relationships that are loving and safe – both with others and with God. When we have experiences that dis-prove our fears, trust begins to grow there. Sometimes though, we need more than this. We need a transformation that is a healing gift of God’s grace. I think this comes to each person differently, as we journey with God. I've experienced that beautiful grace before, and as I pet Charlie's soft head I am filled with hope for all of us who are in need of God's healing care.

GUEST POST: Not Another Starbucks...A Church by Josh Clark

I was recently viewing a website - I'm a Graphic designer by day, M.Div student by night - and I came across a church plant website that was planning on starting in September. It had that "emerging" feel (whatever that is) and so I read a bit closer. They are planning on meeting in a movie theater on Sunday mornings. The web site begins with the question, "When did church become so boring?" Interesting, I thought. It then made the suggestion that few of us like being bored, and that church has become fundamentally boring and that's why people don't want to go to it. This got my wheels turning some more.
There is a perception in the world of Evangenerica (Karlene's made up term) that in order for the Church to succeed and the Gospel to win, then the bearer of the Gospel - that is, the Evangel, and as a body, the Church - must become 'relevant' to society. Oftentimes "relevance" becomes synonymous with "entertaining." What can we do to get more butts in the seats? We get caught in conversation about whether the music is loud enough, or the lights bright enough. Or even, do we have the right glam? American evangelism has become a lot like remodeling a McDonald's. Generally, after about 10 years someone notices that the plastic seat covers are out of style, so they put together a committee of people to implement remodeling in all of their stores just in time to see the styles change once more. There are two problems here: (1) the remodel always comes too late, and (2) even with the remodel they're still serving the same crappy food!
So, we start meeting in movie theaters instead of Churches (or 'Worship Centers' as they've come to be called). We wear street clothes, and serve Starbucks, while playing Rock 'n Roll through our $100,000 sound systems. We start throwing a swear word or two into our daily vocabulary just to fit in (yeah, we're rebels). Yet, relevance should, and does, mean more than simply being more entertaining than we used to be. Church is about more than keeping people from boredom.
Don't get me wrong. I'm not saying this is about music style. What I am saying is that the relevance of the Church is the Gospel of Jesus Christ! It does not live in church models, or music, or mochas. The hope and message of Jesus Christ is the food which we find nourishment and life sustainment on. Yet oftentimes we minimize it in order to be more in tune with culture. I believe that Jesus' message is relevant as read in the gospels. With a world suffering from poverty and war; striking disparity between rich and poor; homelessness, abuse, addiction, brokenness the counter-cultural message of Jesus teaches us a better way to live our lives. It is in Jesus' counter-cultural message that the Church will find relevance in a hurting and broken world. Jesus' message of love, even to the point of laying his life down for the one's he called friends, is more relevant than we can possibly imagine. We must triumph Christ's love boldly, being unashamed of his message of peace, love, compassion, and grace once more. This is our only hope in a world that already has a enough Starbucks.

French Fries and the Tension Between Freedom and Responsibility in Community

The other day we went out with some friends for ice cream. I ordered a sundae with hot fudge and caramel, my husband and daughter each ordered a blizzard. And two of our friends got a large order of hot fries with their ice cream. I wasn’t really hungry, but the entire time we were there the sight and smell of those fries was distracting me. It was all I could do to keep from ordering some for myself even though they were the last thing I needed.

I tell this story to preface some thoughts that have been stirring in my head about the place of alcohol in Christian community. Like many people I know, I was raised in the ‘all drinking is SIN’ branch of the faith and, also like many people I know, have rejected that stance for its un-biblical and un-reasonable position. Among those who condemn all drinking, I will staunchly argue against their position. But I’m feeling uneasy about a growing trend that I’ve observed in the emerging church at large, but also among my own friends – emerging or not. When shots of Jager were offered at a gathering among Christian friends recently, it really gave me pause to think. There’s just a lot of drinking going on these days, and I’m not always sure how to feel about it – especially because I am related to quite a few addicts and people with genetic predispositions for addiction, including my own daughter. I also hope that the church we are preparing to plant will be equipped for ministry among people dealing with addiction. A fellow student at my seminary has told of seeing young adults he knows developing alcoholism after becoming Christians as a result of sitting around talking about God with the beers flowing among Christian friends.

And so I am conflicted about the role and place of alcohol within the church. The power of distraction that those French fries had over me the other evening is nothing by comparison to someone struggling with sobriety in a social setting where people are drinking. Can a community that accepts a lot of social drinking be a safe place for people in recovery? I’m sure most would say that they would refrain from drinking around someone they knew to be a recovering alcoholic. But what about those among us who are addicts in denial? And what about those among us who are addicts in the making? Until we are already trapped, we all tend to carry around a sense of personal immunity to addiction. But for many people, addictions wait to manifest themselves until mid-life and it’s not easy to predict who may be susceptible.

So there is this great tension between personal freedom and social responsibility in community. I don’t know how to resolve this tension. I will not make this black-and-white when it is a gradient issue. But I think we need to be talking about this and wrestling with it, rather than running with our freedom to drink down a road with an unknown destination. Your thoughts?